


You're dead to me.

by orphan_account



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anger, Bad Decisions, Bad Flirting, Badass Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Difficult Decisions, Eren has a stammer, Eren has a stutter, Eren is Nervous, Eren meets the world, Friends to Lovers, Gangs, Horror, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, Innocent Eren Yeager, Levi is So Done (Shingeki no Kyojin), Levi/Eren Yeager-centric, M/M, Modern Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan, Not Canon Compliant, Panic Attacks, Street Rats, Violence, temporarily blind Eren
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2020-12-31
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:01:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 8
Words: 12,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27316690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: In the town of Shina; Japan, nothing lived. People merely survived, holding on to what they could day-to-day. Families were forgotten, children abandoned, friends dismissed.Eren Yaeger; an innocent 19 year old who hid in his mother's house up until her slow and painful demise comes across a gang on his way to the grocery store. He is in trouble...up until he hears someone say "No.."?(DISCONTINUED + EPILOGUE)
Relationships: Levi & Eren Yeager, Levi/Eren Yeager
Comments: 35
Kudos: 133





	1. A man's duty

Shina was a frigid town, pale and frail like a fresh corpse. Blood flowed through the streets more often than not and the sounds of screams became a symphony during the day; so easily dismissed by the residents with how often the haunting sounds were heard like the sound of cars passing in the night. It was merely background noise, something rendered unnecessary to remember by the subconscious. 

Eren never left the house for this exact reason, ever. He merely sat in his room. Specifically; in the corner, on his armchair. He often huddled there with an old and tattered book or two that his mother had purchased or recieved from his younger days. They were outdated, perhaps too much so but Eren didn't know, how could he? He hadn't left his house in years and the last time he did leave the house he had been to young to recall. He never protested or argued to leave the house, a peculiar action some would think. One that would obstruct freedom, but this was not the case. 

He knew he couldn't leave the house, better so, he could leave the house if he wanted to die. Either that or he would recieve a ghastly scar on his face or body. He'd seen the state of the people of Shina when he peered slyly out of the window. People never travelled alone, only in groups and they always, always were visibly armed. A knife glinting in the pocket, a gun poking out of the belt. Even then they looked tattered and worn out. As if they'd been attacked and swallowed by a beast, only to cut the stomach open and escape. Everyone walking past his house always had ripe cuts and if they didn't they were most likely in a gang of 7+ people. 

Eren didn't have a gang of 7+ people, but he had his mother. His sweet, viscious and...sick mother. Up until recently, she had been of wonderful health. Of course, she was the ones to grab the groceries and necessities for their ancient and creaking house and she was well known across the areas so she only had a few injuries and scars on her person but Eren should have known that sooner or later she would have been consumed and destroyed by the hungry streets. 

A brain hemorrhage, that's what the books all pointed at. Eren was an expert in engineering, nursing and architecture thanks to his extensive book reading, after all, he had nothing else to do with all his years. He usually deemed this knowledge a privilege however now it was nothing but a burden, for once in his life he wished he could be...he could be...what was that word again? He wondered often, there was a word, long, chunky, sad and stupid but he couldn't remember it. It wasn't memorable. 

He watched his mother slowly pass, he thought it couldn't have been worse from the first day that he saw her. You see, she had to drag herself to their horrid house when she got attacked but she was concussed. When she finally cranked open the front door she fell harshly on her face with a smack, her legs curled up and twisted like noodles when she attempted to rise up again. Eren ran to her side when he realised that the sound of her falling over and over wasn't the sound of gunshots or a fight outside but something much closer and personal. 

She lasted a week, the stubborn old hag. Eren selflessly wished she would have passed sooner to spare herself the pain. They both knew she would inevitably go but unlike Eren, she was in denial. She tried to tell him over and over that she was fine but the words were slurred; lost in translation. Eren never cried once in front of her, just held her hand through it and when it became clear that she was moments away from leaving he interlinked their hands and stroked her hair, telling her that she was merely going to sleep for a while. A tear rolled down her pale face and as if it symbolized her acceptance to the other realm she went, like that. No goodbye, no miracle doctor running through the door, no last letters and definitely no sentimental last words. 

Eren covered her body with his pale blue duvet and closed her bedroom door, he couldn't bare to deal with her corpse now and he hoped the smell wouldn't protrude anytime soon although deep down he knew it would. It was only when he entered his dimly lit room and plopped back in his armchair that he cried. He sobbed and sobbed and sobbed until his throat grew cold and creaky and his eyes reddened, eventually falling into a long and throbbing sleep. His last thoughts were a mix of how much he would miss her and, selfishly, what on earth he would do next. Her being his only parent meant that he would inevitably have to go out to the starving, brutal streets.

$

He kept his eyes on the ground, don't look at anyone, don't hunch your back, don't smile, don't show your face. 

He repeated those words over and over and over. Puddles sploshed over his mother's shoes. He picked her crimson boots, they were feminine and tight and also the wrong way round but he'd never worn shoes before; at least, not that he could remember. So he didn't know how. In fairness, the shoes were also old and had more holes in them than he'd have liked so perhaps he couldn't be blamed for wearing them the wrong way round. He grinned as he remembered a cherished nostaligic memory of his mother scrubbing out mud from her shoes. 

He stopped himself, repeating the words quickly. Don't look at anyone, don't smile, don't hunch your hack, don't show your face. 

The walk was a moment, the same shades of gray from the concrete blurring under his feet. His heart pounded, mind squeezed as he looked up briefly to see if he had reached any stores; he was starving. After his mother had passed he had come to the realization that he hadn't eaten anything but pot noodles since the beginning of her illness. And even that stack ceased to exist 3 days ago. He'd delayed buying new foods for 3 days all because the thought of going to the store to buy necessities was too nauseous for him.

He couldn't delay it any longer, he had no idea what a store looked like. Wasn't that funny? Eren could name almost every constellation in the conceivable sky and yet in all his bookshelves had never come across an image of a store, he knew how to read though and he supposed that was knowledge enough, after all, how hard could it be? He only had to look out for the words "store" and "grocery". It wasn't exactly rocket science. Although he would argue that rocket science was quite easy too. 

He glanced back at the ground, staring at his hands which were nervously picking at each other. He barely looked up for a moment again, and twisted his head around very swiftly to look around, feeling extremely smart that he chose the middle of the night to shop for foods as that was the time that people would be most afraid to leave the house. In other words, the place was hollow, empty. The streets were asleep and the streets can't eat you and swallow you whole if it's unconscious. Eren was hidden in plain sight. 

When, to his utmost horror, he couldn't see a single sign that a store was present his stomach began to sink. He realised there was nothing but plain and bruised buildings that vanished into the distance and all of a sudden wanted to return to his haven, his warm home. How he missed the sweet glow and heat of his fireplace. 

Instantaneously, he decided he would go back to his house. He had no idea what he was doing and that was unwise, it is better to not act on an uncertain decision than to act on a bad one. However, he realised this too late. 

Hands pulled him into an alley. There were many, not one pair like his mother. 

They were rough, scratchy like the ends of his stubble when he forgot to trim them. They encased him like sinking into warm water in a tub, he couldn't even scream. They were on his mouth, over his stomach. One large one grabbing his ankle and another on his elbow. They weren't malicious movements at first or maybe the adrenaline spared him the pain in the first few moments. Regardless; stinging, irritable pops barrelled his skin all of a sudden. When he looked to the side and saw his twisted arm he couldn't realise his skin tone with the purples and pinks and blues that began to settle in, he also couldn't remember when he was pinned against the ground. 

The sound eventually washed in, for the most it was surprisingly quiet apart from a few collective grunts, huffs and occasional chuckles.

"No." He heard a deep voice exclaim, he hoped briefly that it wasn't the sound of an angel rejecting him from heaven if he really did die. 

When the punches stopped, which he didn't really feel rather than hear with how the skin smacking sound all came to a halt is when he realised the voice was real; he was real, this was real. 

He wanted to be brave, but he couldn't. He cried, trying to swallow down horrendous sobs. By god he hated this world, his first 20 minutes out and he was sure his entire skin colour changed. He tried to move, twitching a finger but other than that nothing worked. He tried to see but his eyesight was a blurry white and black, he couldn't move, couldn't see. He could only hear. 

He heard steps, heavier and heavier as they stomped in wet puddles and hard concrete slabs toward him. They were aggressive, but funnily enough not violent. They weren't desperate but more like the way a mother stomps upstairs to her children when she realises no chores have been done. 

He felt the roots of his hair being severely grabbed at and the source of strength pulled his entire body upwards so that he was forced to stand. He was nothing but jelly though, if whoever this man was let go of him he would simply crumble back down into the ground. 

"This is what you do to an innocent boy?" The voice tutted, turning Eren's entire figure towards the group of men who just beat him to a pulp as if he was the lightest thing on Earth. 

"I leave you savages for five fucking seconds and you beat the first twink you see like a pig." The voice continued calmly, it was scary, deep, hoarse. Whoever was speaking sounded heartless and yet murderous all the same. 

"Levi---" a shaking voice quivered from the gang of violent men, 

"-I don't want to hear it." He groaned, turning Eren to face him, "Look at the boy, John. Look what you did to his face. I can't even tell what his ethnicity is, I can't even tell if he's awake,"

"You all disgust me, you say you want reform. That you pray to God for change. Tell me; what God would let you see heaven with how you have hurt this boy. And don't think I don't know what you guys do, I've seen the others. Mikasa, Crysta, Marco, Jean. I see how you rape women and beat men like wild animals." 

The group of men's breathing got steadily heavier, some seemed as if they were about to speak but thought better, smacking their lips shut. Eren could practically feel the floor vibrating at his toes with how they were shivering. He wondered who Levi was and his heart dropped at the thought of getting on his bad side. 

"Levi-" John tried again, the voice cracking. 

"Don't litter my name with your filthy tongue you dog." He ordered, setting Eren down gently against some full bin bags so that he was sitting down, legs splayed and yet in a really twisted way, comfortable. His back was supported by the brick wall behind him and he pretended momentarily that he was on some bean bags, wanting so badly to leave reality and pretend he was somewhere else. 

"I dismissed your rapist and abusive tendencies when your kin came crying to me, saying how you've changed and should join my group for good and yet clearly I should never dismiss my gut instincts again. Once a piece of shit, always a piece of shit, no?" 

One in the group of men began sobbing harshly, praying to God to spare him. 

"Tell me, why should I let you live?" Levi finally asked. 

Seconds passed by, and noone had an answer. Eren heard on in wonder, and grave fear. When noone answered and silence prevailed after what felt like a good five minutes, he spoke with a tiny and shaking voice. 

"Levi...? I-is it Levi?" Eren asked, terrified out of his mind. 

"Yes?" Levi replied, turning to face Eren even though the younger boy couldn't see. 

"W-what happened? Did the guys go away?" 

Levi bent over, his breath ghosting over Eren's face. Eren could have sworn he could smell the iron and raw stench of blood, his stomach dropped briefly and he wondered if he would die now. If this was finally it, at this 'Levi's' hands, well he would just have to accept it. 

But he never accepted it, because it didn't come. Instead he felt a soft and firm hand graze over his shoulder and eventually he felt someone briefly hoisting him upwards, his arm was slung over Levi's shoulder and Levi, with a hand twisted around Eren's waist, was partially supporting all of Eren's weight with how his feet were just hovering over the ground. Levi began to walk and Eren tried oh so hard to suppress painful groans. 

"Levi..." Eren whispered. 

"Yes?" Levi replied. 

"What happened to the guys?" 

"Hmm-- they're dead." Levi remarked as if he was stating what he had for breakfast and Eren gasped under his breath, wondering how he didn't hear a single second of them being killed and horrified that his health relied currently on that of a murderer, even if it was for his benefit. Levi took in Eren's pale face;

",It's fine, you're fine." 


	2. A magic trick

Fire cackled at Eren as the wind howled brutally outside, the scene being almost whimsically supernatural. The witch and the werewolf coming out at the crack of dawn. 

Eren sat opposite to a fireplace, waiting patiently for his fate, he was in Levi’s house...or at least what he presumed to be Levi’s house. His eyesight was damaged into little blurs (steadily improving, still bad), but from what he forced himself to focus on he regarded that the place was large, at the doorframe white pillars hung from the ceiling and stole the space from the ground, on walking further in large windows attacked the opposite walls which themselves were plastered in a beige and black wallpaper, tattered with images of small flowers. Faint herby aromas danced gently through the air, twisting to merge with the ripe scent of petrichor. It was a tranquil atmosphere to say the least and Eren felt himself go...

It was briefly terrifying for Eren when he’d let his eyes droop, he hadn’t known where Levi had scattered to since he arrived, he only felt hands lead him directly into what seemed to be a living room space and finally sensations of an encasement of blankets but before he could twist his head around awkwardly to express his gratitude, Levi had disappeared, evaporating into thin air. So yes, it was fair to say things were strange and there was no way Eren could or should have let his bruised eyelids plop downwards, even though they begged so desperately for a moment’s rest. 

“Your name?” A voice asked commandingly out of nowhere and Eren startled so that he knocked his head into the wall on which he rested it. 

Names...names were interesting Eren thought. They were something that were assigned to almost everyone from their first moment on Earth, sometimes changed, most often not. People just seemed to accept it, like it, live with it, but what they really—

“You can change it.” The voice continued when Eren took a beat too long to answer, “Levi lets people change their names, but he has to know your real name, otherwise you could have a horrible track record and we wouldn’t know.” The sound seemed to be coming from a figure in the darkness, 

the silhouette stood there, tall and straight and basking in the darkness as if it fed off of every bit of its mysterious anonymity. They then stepped partly into the light, and although half of their body was still dripping in dark shadows they were visible enough to see their features clearly.   
  
It was what appeared to be a woman, 5ft9 or 5ft10. Her head was fluffed up with wild, reddish-brown feathers of hair and her glowing tawny eyes were quite briefly maniacal, Eren knew instantly that she wasn’t the mentally sane type, she clearly gave off the aura of a crazy scientist. 

“No offence but uh, w-who exactly are you m-madame.” Eren tried so hard to be respectful. 

“Madame?!” She squawked, eyebrows furrowing and stepping closer and closer to Eren who sat helplessly against the wall. Layers of blankets weighing his increasingly terrified body down, “I’ll have you know I am not bound down by pronouns like the rest of you basic shits!” 

“Hange.” Levi threatened, appearing from the corner at just the perfect time, “Already tormenting our new guest?” He leaned against the doorframe from which he just passed through. 

“They don’t care what pronoun you use, if it’s she, he, madame, sir...” Levi glanced at Hange while saying this, “Although they do prefer the pronoun ‘they’” Levi sighed, “I think Hange is just trying to put you off being here.”

Hange tensed up, plodding to Levi with striding steps both full of and barren of energy, when they reached a worryingly close distance, that which looked like they were ready to enter a testosterone filled quarrel, they leaned closer to Levi and muttered; “Can you blame me, I mean with the last ones you hired—” 

Levi scowled, “This one isn’t like the last one. I can vouch for him, he doesn’t even know how to throw a punch.” 

Eren twiddled with his fingers, trying to act as if he wasn’t there seeing as Levi and Hange were conversing as if that was the case anyhow.   
  
“Plus” Levi added, his body facing entirely to Eren, monotone voice providing odd comfort “I’m not trying to hire the guy, seeing as my boys hurt him it would be rude to just let him bleed out in the street.” 

The street...Eren’s mind slotted back to the events that occurred a few hours ago. The iron stench of blood, the merciless slap of concrete, the sound of flesh against flesh as if connected and broke and bruised. He’d have nightmares, that he was sure.   
  
“I’m sure your mum and dad would be worried sick if they saw you coming home in this state too.” Hange continued Levi’s train of thought with their chin in their palm, trying to convince themselves more than anyone, Eren frowned momentarily. The expression made his jaw ache. He didn’t even consider the fact that some people just assumed he had parents, but of course, how could they know?

His existence was simply a smaller ripple in a vast river. Levi focused down at the boy who was gazing at the ground, Levi knew everything he needed to know from that unembellished gesture and he instantly felt that Eren was a survivor, a scared one at that.

He whispered something to Hange, something that Eren couldn’t bother to catch. Hange huffed like a child being sent to their room and strode away, disappearing back into the shadows and out of the living room. 

“What is your name?” He questioned, all of a sudden in front of Eren. 

“Um....um...John.” Eren lied, 

Levi offered a fleeting smirk, “Well, Um-um John, I’m going to need your real name. You can change it later if—“ 

“Hange filled me in already...” Eren cut off, giving up already with the way his shoulders slouched suddenly, “my name is Y-Yeager. Eren, Eren Yeager, and uh—I don’t want to...change it l-later.” 

Levi grabbed some supplies that were already by his side and began dampening a cloth, when he pressed it gently to Eren’s face, he visibly winced. It was definitely alcohol, and that definitely felt like steaming coal. 

”If it’s any consolation, Eren Yeager is much cooler than Um-um John.” 

Eren let out a startled chuckle which was a mistake as he practically felt a wound which was slashed across his cheek slice open. From the mere muscle movement— from smiling! He sincerely regretted all the times he took his healthy, non-aching face and body for granted. 

He also noticed that this Levi, made a joke. He didn’t seem too bad...he actually seemed quite...nice? He had to remind himself that this man silently butchered a group of men hardly 2 hours ago, although they were murdering rapists. 

“Levi?” 

“Hm” 

“How did you know those men?”   
  
Levi glanced at him strangely before tossing the wet and used cloths away and gathering new ones, dampening them with alcohol again before tapping gently at Eren’s face. 

”There were rumours that they’d gang raped someone, that’s how I first heard about them.”

Levi threw away the cloth, now bloody, he dampened another. He dabbed at the wounds on Eren’s cheeks.

“I caught them, obviously. But because these were only rumours and I couldn’t be certain, I held them in a jail I have in the basement, the day I found out they raped the girl as a fact I went down to kill them but someone rang the doorbell.” 

He threw the cloth away, dampening another.

”When I opened it, it was their sister and brother. Three of the guys in jail were their brothers, they were crying at my doorstep, saying that it was a mistake, that they deserved to live and from now they would swear to do good.” 

“So you let them go?” Eren quizzed, looking astounded and slightly...disheartened.   
  
“Obviously not” Levi tsk-ed, “I gave them a month to do good deeds and join my group and promised them that way I wouldn’t kill them, I would just let them rot in prison for the rest of their lives.” 

“But that was almost a month ago. And a rapist, or someone quite affiliated with battery has an obsession. It’s like a drug to them, the more they’re off it the more they want it. They said they wanted to go out tonight and do good, they said that I should lay off and trust them. Obviously I didn’t trust the fucks for a second, and when I found them it was clear they weren’t ready for change. At. All.” Levi gritted out. 

Eren looked at him with wide, doe eyes. 

“I apologise Eren. I knew their nature and I took my eyes off them, even if it was just 5 minutes.” 

Eren quickly shook his head as if what Levi was saying was absurd and he couldn’t possible introduce anything more preposterous. 

He wanted to thank Levi with intent, wanted to let him know how grateful he was but his nerves wouldn’t let him and the sting in his cheeks scolded him. Telling him that if he continued to diverge on this path there would only be more violence to come. 

No. It was best to let Levi heal him and then they would disunite on their separate paths come tomorrow morning. 


	3. A good look

How long was a week? When everyone was concerned and busied with their daily lives and constant action it could seem as if a week lasted all but a moment. Some even found themselves grappling at the strings of time, desperate to go backwards but with no avail. After all, a winding road which was consistently crumbling could only continue forward on a straight path. 

How about when there was nothing to be busied with? When the only thing keeping one entertained was drawing make-believe patterns on a cream colored ceiling, it was undeniably difficult to see time as a valuable asset, or at least Eren thought so. His days that winded on in a hospice bed, in Levi's mansion, were wasted. Apart from a chess-board near his bed placed on a small wooden table and Hange who peered in now and again, continuously becoming more HD every time, Eren had nothing to do or to look forward to. In fact, he hadn't even seen Levi since the night that he'd initially healed him. 

Speaking of Levi...Eren wondered where he was. If Levi had gone through the trouble of getting rid of a group of supposedly reformed men for him, why had he just disappeared unexpectedly? He took such good care of the younger boy and then had vanished into thin air like a phantom, leaving the bruised and broken Eren's wellbeing in the likes of Hange no less, who Eren had come to see had a just as maddening appearance that matched their equally manic personality. Wild hair and wild eyes, wild smile like a riled child. 

Speaking of wild, the night in which everything changed had began just as feral as Hange themselves. The hail angrily attacked the glass of the frail hospice window and the winds screamed in turn, the setting scared Eren and he couldn't help wondering if a miraculous disastrous event that he'd read in his multitude of books he'd had at home would occur. He went though each of the options, _a hurricane? No it's wasn't windy enough. Flooding? No, the hale was too thick._ Even as he rationalized himself out of every paranoia, he couldn't help but bite at his fingernails. Eventually he called for Hange, who came plodding through the room grumpily. Looking like they'd rather be in hell than in that room. 

"What is it?" They bit out. 

"The hale's uh-strong."

They gritted out a bitter laugh, "What do you want me to do about it? Unfortunately I'm not God."

Eren breathed in, "The-the windows are big here."

"And?"

"Can I go to the living room for now, I-I mean, I-it's a bigger space. "

Hange looked temporarily stunned and then cradled their waist, chortling limitlessly. 

"Oh dear-" they snorted again, "-and here I thought you were in this room because you were too depressed to move around. Don't tell me you've been glued to the bed because you thought you weren't allowed to move?"

Eren went red, biting his lips and utterly sheepish. 

$

Eren was plopped down, seated on the frigid ground centimeters away from the living room's sizzling fireplace. His arms stretched outwards to feel the comfort of the glowing heat. A fuzzy blanket swathed him and for the tiniest of a moment he felt somewhat at home. He reluctantly let go of that somber feeling, getting used to anything around Shina was a dangerous, dangerous practice.

Hange had grumbled something about him being an utter, utter imbicile while assisting the still-injured boy down the stairs and away from the Hospice. As soon as that mission was completed Hange dashed to a place unknown upstairs and Eren hadn't heard as much as a creak since. He knew this house was somewhat like a ghost-town, empty most days and cold to any outsider. Although, it did seem as if Eren was the exception. The house didn't have a soul, it couldn't, Eren knew this. But in an odd sense, he felt like the house was a woman and that she, in a strange way, took a liking to Eren. Protecting him as well as and like its inhabitants. 

The front door slammed open and light, pattering footsteps travelled a small distance. Eren twisted his head around, not processing the taps of the steps in fear that he'd missed the sound of a hurricane and he'd finally run out of luck. 

There was no hurricane violating and destroying the insides of the Levi residence, but a toned man instead. He was pale, short in stature. His features were sharp and elegant in every way possible, resembling the Greek sculptures in Eren's mythology books. His hair contrasted his complexion, thick, piercing black strands seeming like carefully woven frills, regal and classy simultaneously. He stood with a wealthy amount of self-esteem, nowhere near the borderline of snobby and cocky, but rather sure and confident. He shook his head quickly, drying his silky, hale-filled hair and smiled tenderly at Eren. The huddled up injured boy tried to look composed, but his eyes widened and jaw went slack in the room of the most beautiful man he'd ever regarded in all his years of living. The models and statues in his books didn't even compare. 

Nevertheless, after a few fleeting seconds, Eren registered that there was a stranger in their house. He was about to call for Hange when the man spoke;

"You seen Hange anywhere kid?"

Eren slammed his jaw shut, knowing for certain his irises were black from how badly his pupils dilated. The voice, that monotone, crisp, clear and yet frightening tone that could make anyone tremble and shake in fear...that...was this Levi?

He didn't believe it, for one the Levi in his head was littered in scars and snarling violently most the time. Secondly, Eren was still ill and pretty much bed-ridden, his ears could be deceiving him-

"Eren?"

That was Levi's voice, definitely. Filled spontaneously with adrenaline, Eren suddenly pointed at the looping marble staircase at the left of the room in which he observed Hange ascending to a couple of minutes ago, wrapping the blankets tighter around his icy body from the winds that breached in from the still opened front door. Levi nodded in gratitude and turned to close the front door, he wore a thickened black trench-coat and a white collared shirt underneath, accompanied with some plain charcoal-grey denims for trousers. 

Levi marched onwards to the first floor and just as Eren began to hear the mumbled sounds of Levi and Hange conversing on some serious-sounding and heated topic, the front bell panged with a high pitch, making him squeal and jolt in discomfort. The muffled conversation upstairs abruptly terminated and the sounds of pattering steps appeared once again, this time descending down the wreathing stairs. Levi opened the front doors widely, without a second's hesitation, 

"Levi Ackerman, we have reason to believe that Eren Yaeger Kruger is taking residence in your house." An assured and deep-voiced woman stated.

Levi squinted, "Who's asking?" 

"I'm afraid it's the courts sir, they have reason to believe he has committed a crime."

Eren began trembling slightly in his blankets and he looked up at Hange located at the very top of the staircase, they looked moderately worried and puzzled which only served to make Eren shiver further. 

"When's the trial?" Levi sounded completely void of emotion. 

"In an hour." 

Levi looked down, contemplating his options. He knew that an hour was an unfair amount of time to settle into this revelation and attend the court. Some countries may even have deemed it as unconstitutional and a violation of basic rights, Eren didn't even have a lawyer for whatever crime he could have committed. But this was Shina, there was no justice, no comprehensive court-system, no lawyers and certainly no rights. 

"We'll be there." Levi told the woman and the doors slammed shut. Everyone stood or sat where they were in lax shock, Levi deep in his thought process. 

Eren whispered "H-hange...Levi...I-I swear I haven't committed any c-crime-" 

"-Save it." Hange commanded angrily, strutting over to Levi they muttered "And for the actual justice system to be involved too? In this town? I told you he wasn't to be trusted."

Levi turned his gaze up to Hange, the dip in his jaw flexing slightly in the dim light setting "We'll see what happens when we get to the courts."

Hange snorted darkly, "I keep telling you, Levi. There's always a fee for giving out compassion for free."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Glad you guys are enjoying the fic, sorry I update so rarely but I'm just niche like that.  
> Love you guys, stay safe!  
> Kudos and comments are appreciated *kissy face*.


	4. A beating down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys like this chapter, it was definitely one of my favourites to write!

The chubby judge took his time, sitting bored and slumped back against his throne situated on the centre wall, slightly higher than where the empty jury box and bustling gallery was. He sighed while flicking through pages of a matte, neutral-coloured file, with the name Eren amateurishly plastered onto the cover.

Levi and Hanji watched lowly next to one another from the gallery, their gazes surprisingly collected. Half the town came along too, sat excitedly in the seats . It appeared that everyone but Hanji and Levi were aware of this local scandal, and the reality of Eren’s disheartening situation was nothing but theatre for the inhabitants of Shina.Whisperings and gossip came to a halt as the judge slowly stood.

“Eren Yeager, aged 19, you have been brought here by the courts for committing a dehumanising crime, homocide in the first degree.”

Chaos ensued, some people screamed and other began muttering to each other. Sounds of gasps and surprises bloomed and Hanji turned their head violently to beam at Levi, a petty expression of you see, I was right. Plastered on their face. Levi sat still, his arms crossed against his chest. His composure did not falter and he hadn’t bothered to look at Hanji, he just continued to stare threateningly at the judge who was rubbing his bald head. Levi felt deeply that something wasn’t quite right.

Eren, bound down by his wrists which were tightened dramatically to a pole in the middle of the courtroom, was exposed to multiple different hostile exclamations.

“Shame!” A women yawped.

Eren peeked up at the gallery shamefully, all of which were now spitting cuss words at him with the exception of Levi and Hanji who looked on different areas condescendingly. Tears brimmed in Eren’s eyes and his cheeks flushed a nasty, cruel red. He was lost for words.

The judge banged his fist against his oak table thrice, “Quiet!” He commanded, “—After killing his mother and leaving her to die in her house, Eren went on a murderous spree in which he took the lives of three innocent male citizens. This act was in cold blood, and disgusting-”

Levi’s eyes widened, three...males...Could it be? It was John and his gang, the rapists and beaters. Levi was the one responsible for them, and they certainly weren’t innocent. Levi’s stomach churned as the judge’s voice morphed into uneven pitches of low and high and blurred sounds. He quickly began to rise but Hanji grabbed a firm hold on his wrist, pulling him back down onto the torn seats with all their strength. They looked at Levi mildly stunned.

“Hanji-“ Levi hissed, trying to release their grip, “It was me, not Eren. The rapist fuckers I told you about-“

“I know Levi, shit. I was so wrong.” they squeezed Levi’s wrist rigidly, “but say that now and they’ll just arrest you and Eren. Eren’s mother, I doubt he killed her but it still looks bad.” They tutted, “It’d be perfect for them, two birds with one stone. They’ve been wanting rid of you since the get go.”

Levi’s teeth sunk into his tongue until the taste of iron pooled in his mouth, but Hanji was logical and annoyingly...correct. Levi started bouncing his leg up and down, tensing his hands around each other to the point where his knuckles whitened. He tuned back into what the judge was saying,

“The brutal murder of Carla Yeager was a surprise to all, after Eren knocked her occipital lobe with a thick object she was left visually impaired-“

“That wasn’t me-” Eren’s voice strained, tears pacing down his embarrassed face. “I swear...” he trailed off, tone cracking, he pulled against the handcuffs tied to the pole but with no avail, “I-I want a lawyer, I m-mean what the hell is this?! There’s n-no jury, no lawyer, how is this fair-“

“Enough!” The judge boomed, face purplish from fury, “I won’t have a grimy murderer address me that way.” He sneered, pointing snobbishly at Eren’s tiny figure, “In this town, I am the judge, the jury and the lawyer. And I hate to tell you this, Eren Yeager, but you’re not exactly in my good books now boy.”

“W-where’s your evidence?” Eren pleaded.

The judge snorted, “Evidence? Mr Yeager, your mother was found dead with only your fingerprints on her corpse.”

“-b-but that’s because-!”

“You ask me a question, you will listen boy.” The judge retaliated, “We found her body on the same day we found the men, their deaths couldn’t have been too far apart in time. The cause of death was similar; battery. Then when inspecting the house your mother lived in further, we see that she had a mysterious child no one knew of, you Eren. Accompanied by many....books.” The judge held up a felt blue-cased book, “This seem familiar boy?”

“S-Shakespeare?” Eren tried, confounded.

“Precisely. I do not know who this Shakespeare fellow is, but this book titled Macbeth has a lot of worrying content within.” The judge flailed the book around for display to the ignorant citizens of Shina who’d never read a book in their lives, they seemed astounded. Levi and Hanji, who had the privilege of not being illiterate, looked on in bewilderment. Why on earth was the judge holding up a book of Macbeth?

“-I believe the contents of the book contains messaging of the devil.” The judge egged on and the audience drew in a breath, Levi had to physically stop himself from groaning at the pure idiocy.

The judge yanked through the book, licking his fingers to grab the yellowed pages firmly “Here in this book it has chanting from three sisters named the weïrd sisters, it reads “ _Fair is foul and foul is fair, hover through the dust and the filthy air.”_ Mr Yeager, do you believe fair is indeed foul?”

“W-what?!” Eren heaved, “I-it’s just a book! Shakespeare—you don’t know Shakespeare? I-it means nothing to me, I-its just some light reading!”

The cocky judge reproved with a tsk, “You believe dealings with demons to be a light read?”

“W-what?” Eren turned to the gallery, all of whom looked righteously contemptuous. “Do you a-all think like this too? That a book proved I killed my mother, who I loved and appreciated and cared for daily. You’re all just so damn uptight. M-makes sense why you’d pick on me, none of you even know me and I’m poor and have nothing. You don’t w-want justice, you just want a closed case! And those three boys, they were just awful! Yeah, I saw them, I didn’t kill them but they were horrible-”

Eren wasn’t given the chance to finish, a foot smacked him horizontally across his face, leaving a gash. His lungs sucked in giant breaths of air in shock while he goggled at the ground, and he looked up at whoever just booted his visage. Levi hovered above him, face casted by shadows and null of sentiment. The kicks didn’t stop, leaving his already bruised face in an even worse state, and before he knew it his body went cold and numb. A piercing sense of betrayal slithering through his blood, threatening to infect every drop. When the kicks finally stopped Levi’s mouth began to move, it briefly registered to Eren that the judge had instructed Levi to cease, frenzied with alarm.

“Huh?” Levi interrogated, fondling the roots of Eren’s hair before harshly tugging it upwards so that everyone in the room could see his bloodied features, “I thought you were going to kill him Judge Bushell, I mean don’t you basically give death penalty to every murderer? You can’t even handle seeing the boy get beat?”

“Yes but-“

“I have an alternative decision, one that I think will make everyone in the room very happy. Excluding the boy. Of course.” Levi glanced around the room for reinforcement, when he regarded that everyone had their mouths smacked shut he continued, “When officer Ymir came to my house, she saw Eren lying on the ground. The bruises on his face? I’m the one who gave him them, I found him after he killed the three men, obviously I was....angry to say the least. The three men were good friends of mine, Hanji can vouch for me.” He he gestured in Hanjis direction, everyone turned briefly to them.

“Ah, yes yes.” Hanji nodded.

“Being the good, good friend of John, James and Gillian who died at the hands of this dangerous young boy, I say that I should be the one to determine his fate? Any....objections?” His eyes toured the room once again and he was glad to see believing looks of pity. Good, he thought. Sympathy was good, people would be more compliant if they were sympathetic.

“I suppose so.” The judge concurred, slumping back into his chair, “Although you better have a good proposal Levi.” 

Levi snickered, “Of course. The boy will work at my house every day, he will only have a limited amount of sleep. I will take him out often to complete challenging tasks in my favour, he’ll regret every second of killing John, James and Gillian, I guarantee.”

Levi gazed back down at Eren who looked up at him spitefully, dizzied and confuddled, Levi punted him once more for show.

The judge smacked his baton against its wooden plate once and concluded the session with a brief and snarky statement, giving all liberties over Eren to Levi. People chattered as they fled the courtroom and the judge chucked Eren’s handcuff keys to Levi before following the others out. Hanji sat motionless in their seat. The room suddenly became empty except for the three of them,

Levi leaned down to free Eren’s wrists and Eren flinched, still staring daggers into the marble courtroom floor.

“Eren...it had to be done.” Levi whispered, unlocking his wrists with a click. Eren rubbed his bruised hands and refused to meet Levi’s tranquil grey eyes, Levi sighed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That was an...absolute journey lol
> 
> Took me long to write this one but I had to get it perfect, did I surprise you?? 
> 
> Kudos and comments are appreciated! Thanks so much guys, stay safe *kisses*


	5. A great scene

There was no soft warmth surrounding Levi’s residence today, only a stiff sense of darkness. Everything felt so motionless, so ill, so dead. Hanji followed in Levi’s footsteps towards the bland structure and Eren was deep asleep in Levi’s arms. He’d dozed off in the car ride back and Levi knew that Eren needed those few minutes of rest, the option to wake him up was about as appealing as taking a knife to his throat.   
  
So, Levi cradled him in his arms, flinching slightly when he felt Eren’s ribs scrape him through his shirt. By god the boy was skinny. The older man mentally made a note to restock their fridge and refill their cabinets. 

He would also never admit to anyone but, as he stood at the doorstep waiting for Hanji to unlock the front door, he couldn’t help but feel mysteriously stitched to the 19 year old in his grasp. For some reason he would do anything, climb the highest mountain, brave the nastiest dragon and all for Eren. He didn’t know why.

And yet all he could do in the courts was beat him up in the most ravenous and humiliating way fathomable. Levi wanted to say he despised the action but he knew it was necessary. Hating the action would only mean hating himself and his judgement and that was not something he could afford to do, if he wanted Eren dead he would’ve sat at the gallery with his mouth wide open like the rest, a beating was a small price to pay for Eren’s complete guaranteed safety. 

“You coming in?” Hanji pecked curiously, Levi hadn’t realised they’d already opened the door. 

“Yeah.” 

$ 

At 11PM Levi slugged downstairs to see Eren and Hanji conversing by the fireplace, it seemed that the area had become a common place for those 2 to chatter these days. Eren was enveloped in a freightage of fuzzy blankets and Hanji crouched down near him, both glancing distantly at the untamed fire dancing in front of them. 

It appeared that the 2 of them hadn’t acknowledged Levi who was basked in the bottom staircase darkness as they continued chatting; 

“—I know-“ Hanji muttered, “-but you would have been killed otherwise, so I really need to say this Eren I’m so sorry.” 

”Hanji p-please stop apologising.” Eren sighed. 

”No. The way I treated you was not—“ 

Levi spiralled the rest of the stairs, coughing to make his presence known. Eren went slightly rigid, keeping his eyes wholly fixed on the fire and refusing to meet Levi’s eyes, Hanji looked up at Levi and then back at Eren, their gaze switching between the 2, “uhh I just remembered I have something to do.” They announced before running off upstairs. 

Levi closed the loud distance between them, sitting down on the ground next to Eren. It had been a while since they last spoke in the courts and Levi had been quite clearly avoiding the younger boy. A moment of silence lingered on as they both watched the fireplace, Eren was the first to break the resistant quiet. 

”Um...your hair l-looks nice?” Eren complimented a little too questioningly, Levi looked at him puzzled and then let out a small chuckle. 

”I’m not the type to dilly-dally and fix issues with unspoken words hoping they’ll go away Eren. Obviously you’re hurt.” There it was, Levi thought, he’d addressed the elephant in the room. All that was left was for Eren to tango, cooperate. 

Eren contemplated sadly at the ground, still frowning instead of meeting Levi’s eyes, “The s-sunset looked n-nice today.” He changed the subject once more. 

Levi groaned, almost defeated, “Eren...”. Once again, no reply.   
  
Levi was about to yield, go upstairs to his chambers and leave all this behind when a thought suddenly occurred to him from the blue. Eren was poetic, sweet in nature, obsessed with novels and books. It had been consistently clear that actions meant more than words to him. So Levi rised, holding his hand out for the younger boy to grasp. 

Eren stared into Levi’s palm for a few fleeting seconds, for a moment Levi was certain that his gesture would be kindly rejected but to his delight the warmth of Eren’s soft palm tentatively enveloped his. Levi led Eren up the staircase, and then past his chambers up another. Eventually the stairs no longer were coated with carpets but marble and the weather steadily became cooler. They were going up to the roof.

When they’d finally arrived on the flat and high marble surface of the roof, Eren let go of Levi’s hands as his eyes transformed as big as saucers. He went closer and closer to the iron rails, leaning on them to goggle at the sky which were painted with an array of white and yellow glowing dots, stars that shone beams onto the next. They sat on the sky’s yellow, purple, blue and white canvas, melting onto one another. 

Levi smiled to himself once registering Eren’s reaction. As he’d pattered closer to the other boy he pointed at one of the stars, the largest glowing one from the bunch. 

“I have a story about that star, wanna hear it?” 

Eren turned his head to face Levi excitedly, right before he nodded eagerly. 

”That star is called the Canis Major, whenever I couldn’t sleep my mother used to tell me this story.” He breathed in, “The Canis Major was small at first, smaller than all the other stars. The other stars always made fun of it for being so small, so it used to cry and cry and cry. It used to cry so much that one day its light almost went out forever, and it would’ve died.”

“But, a dwarf star came over one day to Canis Major and said, _why are you upset?_ Canis Major said _I’m so small so I’m weak, how I wish I was like the others_. So the dwarf star got angry, the dwarf star said _if you were like the others you would’ve been a horrible star too. Your size doesn’t mean anything, you could’ve been a horrible little star and a horrible big star._ Canis Major said _maybe you’re right_ , and before it went to leave, the dwarf star slapped Canis into a dark sleep. When Canis woke up and saw all the other stars staring at it shocked, it was a surprise. But all it knew was that the other stars never bullied it again, it was also extremely extremely upset with the dwarf star that slapped it.” 

Levi paused for a moment,

”Wait is that it? B-but why did the stars stop bullying Canis?” Eren queried curiously. 

“Well, Canis went around holding a huge grudge for hundreds and hundreds of years right?”

”Against the dwarf star?” Eren pondered, 

“Mhm.” Levi confirmed, “So Canis went looking for the dwarf star, Canis is still looking for the dwarf star to this day. But that’s the catch. The dwarf star is dead, it gave all its light and power to Canis Major when it slapped it so that Canis could be happy and live on, the dwarf star saw how genuine Canis was and realised how important its presence was. And today, Canis Major is the biggest star in the viewable sky but it will never know.” 

”I-is this one of those moral child stories?” Eren scoffed. 

“Yes.” Levi deadpanned, “It shows us that we will only truly be free when we realise that bad things are happening for us and not to us.” He took both of Eren’s soft hands in his own tenderly, “I can’t apologise for what happened in the court. I want you alive Eren, whether you are angry at me or not. Just like the dwarf star, I need you to live, I need you to be happy. I need you to know how bright your light is, you can be angry at me I don’t care, but don’t let that stop the amazing you from being fucking amazing.” 

Eren bit his tongue to hold back the pools gathering in his eyes, “Levi...” he squeezed the older man’s palm, “That’s th-the sappiest shit I’ve ever heard...” he giggled. 

”And that’s the first time I’ve heard you swear.” Levi retaliated, booping Eren’s cute round nose with his pointer finger.   
  
“—Levi!” Hanji screeched raucously from downstairs and Levi took one small look to Eren before shooting down the stairs, the way Hanji screamed was...vulnerable, terrified. Eren gulped down the bile forming in his throat and he followed Levi’s steps to the bottom of the mansion as fast as he could in his state.   
  
When he finally reached the living room he saw a horrific scene play out in front of him, Hanji was stood in the middle of the living space with a sharp blade poking threateningly at their throat. Their hair was in a royal red mess and it was clear from the 2 men motionless on the ground that they’d held up a sturdy fight. 

The man holding the dagger to Hanji’s throat was dressed in all black, heavy guns weighed down the sides of his tight trousers and his button up was moderately unbuttoned from the top. As he peered up at Levi, who was standing firmly on the bottom of the staircase, his inky-grey straw cowboy hat cast a grim shadow over his slightly wrinkled features. 

”Levi...” his deep voice maliciously spat, 

“Kenny.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So guys ummmmm twists? Can I get an F in the chat for my buddy the dwarf star 🙏🏼?
> 
> Ok on a more serious note, glad you guys are liking this fic, I really like it too. I feel like I’m finally writing content that I actually enjoy instead of being like a motionless balloon or something if that makes sense. I guess I also really like writing the VN fic but the plot twists on that one is....worrying. 
> 
> Anyways have a great day, hope everyone is doing well xxxx


	6. A hat trick

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eren’s going to be having some ‘memories’ or otherwise hallucinations of previous anxieties or fears, I just want everyone to know from the get-go that these are just paranoid feelings fuelled by panic and previous events and not actual occurrences! Just if anyone was confused.
> 
> This is not about to turn into some shutter island stuff where Eren has a distorted idea of previous events. 
> 
> I haven’t updated in a while but I’m happy I didn’t because it’s often that my writing abilities come through at random splurts if that makes sense? 
> 
> Anyways, I’ll shut up now. Thanks so much for enjoying and reading this fic guys, it means the world.

There had been a vast array of moments in Eren’s life where he’d been scared. Not normal, evolutionary fear but a _bone-chilling,_ _blackening fear_ that attacked his senses and left him in a frozen frenzy of pure shock. 

One had been when his house was robbed some years ago, he remembered hiding under his bed as the floorboards rattled and quivered from the imposter’s heavy boots. He remembered the salty tears itching on his cheeks, he remembered crossing his fingers so tightly that they ached for days after. 

Another had been when his bookshelf fell on him, leaving him immobile until his mother came back home. He fell into a tranquil state of unconsciousness due to the initial hit and when he woke up with a halo of blood soaking his hair like shampoo it wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say he sobbed like a baby. He wasn’t strong enough to lift the bookshelf and was steadily bleeding out. If his mother arrived 5 minutes later than she did at that time then he’s certain he would’ve been a rotting corpse. 

_Now_ was also one of those moments. It wasn’t so much the dead bodies that were paling to deadly grey colours, or Hange who could die violently at any second with a blade pressed uncomfortably close to their throat. No. Eren knew it was Levi’s face that had him trembling.

It was the expression that he sported, his cold, cool reserve was gone. His already pale skin glowed in new-found whiteness and his teeth were visibly clenched as he spat out _Kenny_. He was furious, betrayed and the worst of all- if Eren wasn’t mistaken..a little scared.

If Levi was scared then Eren wallowed in the endless, restless feeling that they were all dead. 

”Eren...” Levi muttered lowly, still gazing at the stranger in the living room “Go to my room and lock it. Now.” The last word had a slight growl to it, it made Eren violently shiver. The dangerous spark of anxiety sprinting up and down his spine. 

Eren turned his whole body, preparing to jog on upstairs and hopefully have his anxious breakdown and panic attack there a lingering thought inhibited his actions. 

Would Levi be okay? 

He turned on his foot, facing the nightmare scene once more and wishing it was all over. “B-but—“ Eren stuttered. 

“Now! Eren!” Levi yelled darkly, he turned his steely iron eyes to Eren and gave him a curt nod, something that said _I’m fine, and I’ll be fine. Don’t worry._

“Yes, _Eren_ -“ Kenny smirked while spitting each word out, “-Why don’t you run off upstairs and listen to Levi like a good little boy.”   
  
His chilling voice made Eren almost faint there and then, the croak and hoarseness made the younger boy fearful in a way he couldn’t articulate. He sent one last perturbed look Levi’s way and allowed his trembling legs to aid him upstairs, up the endless spirals. 

He didn’t know which room was Levi’s, so he ended up settling for the room which was blocked by a gorgeous dark oak door. Every regal bit of it screamed of Levi’s essence and his shaking hand turned the bronze doorknob, he could hear murmurs downstairs. He wanted to go back, he really did. But Levi told him not to. 

He twisted the rounded, floral-engraved doorknob until the bedroom came into view like a sliding transition. It was breathtaking, in the middle of the room sat a silky king-sized bed draped in a matte-black canope, the spotless floors matched the dark oak of the door and a dark desk sat firmly in the corner of the room. Finally, it seemed large windows attacked the side of the room, draping from the top of the ceiling to the utmost bottom of the floor. From here there was a clear view of the driveway which had scatterings of small and large orange, yellow and green trees alike. 

Any other time and Eren would have actually been in ecstasy over the pure beauty of the minimalistic architecture in this room, however, right now his mind spun with wiring thoughts of Levi and Hange and that man. _Kenny_ , was it? 

Eren chewed on the inside of his gum, blood gathered there and he made sure to try to stop it. He couldn’t. His anxiety physically hurt him, he felt like he had to pee, he felt like his stomach was being filled with oil, he felt like his head had been replaced with flying feathers and his brain removed. He tugged at his hair relentlessly, bunches of loose strange coming off on his hands but he didn’t even notice.   
  
He left Levi’s room and loitered a little in the second-floor hallway, crouching down at the ground and pressing his ear to the floor. This way he hoped to hear sounds other than anonymous murmurs and to his horror, his request was approved. 

He heard a shout, an unmistakable, masculine piercing yelp ricochetting off of every surface in this now daunting mansion. That was the moment where it all came rushing back to his head, the situation, the memories, the fears, the _blood,_ looping like a relentless CD _;_

_The initial memory to come in his head was his mother, her smiling face. Her concentrated features as she sprinkled exotic and delicate spices into overused pots. He saw that face begin to darken, fungus grew on it as it became motionless. It became stiff, like a rock, before it clashed into the ground._

Bitter, bullets of tears ran down his face. His hair ripped into pieces in his palm as he dropped the thin, irritable chunks into the ground. He knew what he had to do. 

_The second was a fear of a small group of men, they laughed together. Arm-wresting and chuckles booming throughout the room in the most masculine way until their eyes met Eren’s. Then they pointed, hostility sharpening into their eyes. They began to crack their knuckles as they bounced towards Eren who couldn’t even mutter a defence out in unadulterated dread._

He went into Levi’s room once more, hypnotised in shame and panic and a weird bout of numbness. He ransacked every drawer, seeing what he needed. Twirling the glistening object in his fingers and feeling a fat droplet bounce off of it 

_The third imagining was of Eren standing as a jury member in a court, he looked around curiously to see his peers but no one was there, the only thing filled in was the judge’s seat and the gallery who looked at an empty witness box. Then their gaze switched to Eren. Hostility swapped looks of pity and they all pointed at him in unison, when he looked up he no longer was in the Judiciary but was tied to a pole in the middle of the room. They pointed and laughed and he couldn’t even stutter an explanation._

He, in what felt like circles, pranced down winding stairs. Levi was in Kenny’s grasp now, his eyes widened in what looked to be an overridden look of annoyance . Hange laid out on the ground, unharmed save for a scratch on their throat and looked on while rubbing their neck, visibly violated and murderous. 

Kenny was pulling out a gun from his side- a chunky bit of onyx metal- he was going to shoot Levi.

He pressed it up against Levi’s temple, Hanji screamed, begged and Levi screwed his eyes shut. Nose gushing rhubarb red from a fight that Eren didn’t observe. Levi didn’t fight it, this was going to be it.

He was going to die. 

None of them heard Eren, before even reaching the bottom of the stairs Eren flung himself at Kenny’s stoic and lanky figure. There were no second thoughts. This was a reflex, he couldn’t look on at this whole situation and just do nothing. 

The object in his hand, which was a thick dagger, piercing Kenny’s shoulder as they both cluttered to the ground with aching groans resonating throughout the hollow space. Levi was able to escape Kenny’s grasp due to the two milliseconds that his uncle’s attention faltered with Eren jumping on him like a wild cat. 

A gunshot sounded suddenly, echoing and bouncing, and Eren looked straight into Kenny’s murky irises. Small droplets of tears pattered down the younger’s face, dropping onto Kenny’s snarling features.

Eren jerked backwards, clutching his stomach, eyes as wide as teapots as blood spewed and sprayed from a flesh wound that dug in his belly. His shirt dampened a sickly crimson, the small circle of red growing like an untameable virus. 

“No...” Hanji gasped, Levi could only look on while his head contemplated 1000 different ways to fix this.   
  
Kenny was still conscious, but his finger was chittering on the trigger and the non-fatal stab wound looked deep and sharp, Levi stumbled over to his relative. Kicking him head-on once, twice, thrice until his face was black and purple and he’d definitely been put into a disgraceful slumber. 

After that, he sprinted to Eren who was not too far off, Hange already hovered over him, holding him tightly in their grasp. Tearing cloths with their teeth and wrapping it enough around Eren’s middle to cut the circulation off. 

Eren’s soft, almost freckled eyelids began to droop downwards, he found himself regretting thinking so low of death. It kinda hurt, but once his body turned off it wasn’t so bad. It was like a heavy massage. He’d realised that all along, he was scared for no reason, and a wavering sense of relief racked through him as he prayed that this utter peace was what his mother felt in her last moments. 

“Hey...” Levi whispered, stroking and running tender fingers down Eren’s smooth face, “Don’t die on us okay? If you do I’ll kill you myself.” Levi tried to charm lightheartedly, Eren felt full at the fact that he could hear the worry under every bit of the hidden tone. 

He wanted to reply, wanted to lift his hand up and return the gesture. Tell Levi that he was thankful for him saving his reckless-self countlessly, that this was a favour completely overdue. He wanted to say how hopeful the star story made him, but his voice was lost and the idea of his limbs moving nothing but a sweet, distant memory. 

Yes. Eren was certain for the first time in his life, while tumbling into a sickeningly soothing state, that he would wake up.

For Levi, only for Levi. To tell him. 

”We have to take him upstairs to the hospice-“ Was the last thing he heard escaping from Hange’s lips as the world blurred around him and nothingness swallowed him like a whale in the sea. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have a great day/night guys. If anyone is feeling sad about anything let me know and I’ll totally be here to help out or even just a chat.   
> Stay safe everyone! :)


	7. A daring discontinuation

Helloooooo!   
  


(P.S THERE IS AN EPILOGUE AFTER THIS)  
  


This is a note from author, although this isn’t the most popular fic there has been a few loyal people who have stuck by every chapter religiously and I honestly appreciate that so, so much. So this is for them.   
  


I just want to say that I’ve actually deleted all of my other Ereri fics the only reason I’m not deleting this is bc I’m proud of it and kinda attached to it, I’ll orphan it instead.  
  


I still ship Ereri like fuuuuck but I realise that my addiction with AOT has gotten reaaaaal toxic this is going to sound super funny but I’m really attached to all the characters and it’s genuinely fucking me up whenever I read the manga it just reminds me of my own hopelessness and the war shit that I’ve experienced.   
  
  
The reason I started writing AOT fics was because I wanted to give the happy ending that we knew Isayama’s talented yet bitter ass wouldn’t dare to.

  
This is my opinion! I know some people have related it to positive emotions and will continue watching, some don’t think it’s that deep and like the action but it’s genuinely so unhealthy for me. Anyways thanks for reading this fic guys! 

  
  
(THERE IS AN EPILOGUE LOL I WOULDN'T LEAVE YOU HANGING) 


	8. An ending epilogue

Eren splayed his fingers out on his chest to calm his bumping heart, the heated sand sunk under his figure and he absolutely revelled in the feeling. It felt like nothing he’d ever touched before, here he felt like he could drown in his own tranquility and even in the final moments be completely content. The teal waves would sink over one another, leaving a hauntingly loud and yet gorgeous echo in their rise and fall. 

He felt hands on his hair, delicately running through it like they had a million times over. They massaged his scalp in the most tender, familiar, circular motions and he opened his eyes, squinting at the sudden beam of sun. However, his wince was overtaken by a smooth smile as he took in the face that hovered above him. 

Levi, who usually sported a pale look was all golden tan and sporty looking now. He’d lost that alert, sweaty sheen of sweat and the drawn in brows with a newly replaced soothed, guard-down expression. 

“I forgot to tell you...” he whispered, tugging a little harder at the strings of Eren’s hairs, “Hange called today.” 

Eren jerked up suddenly, grabbing Levi’s arm and tackling him into the yellow, sandy ground, they both let out fits of surprised laughter and chortles as they wrestled. Eventually, Levi ended on top, (he always did); 

“Why didn’t you tell me?!” Eren chuckled, “We haven’t heard from them since we moved here!” 

“Well...it’s-“ The older man stuttered suddenly, face falling and when he sat up, releasing Eren’s wrists, rubbing the back of his neck. 

Eren’s heart dropped down to his guts and he felt the all too familiar feel of dampness gathering and swallowing his eye balls,

“No...” he breathed, “Tell me they’re okay...” 

Levi halted... then shook his head reluctantly, seemingly wincing in pain at a memory and not meeting Eren’s horrified, soccer-sized eyes. Eren let the salty tears spill over, not bothering to conceal his heartbreak. 

“She’s only- Oi! Are you crying?” Levi gasped, his lips tilting up and then looking guilty as sin and sheepish, he speedily ushered Eren back into his hold, “I was only joking Eren! Sorry!” 

“W-What?” Eren stuttered, heart floating upwards again and the weight that was strangling him down like chains being lifted, he grabbed Levi’s chin and squinted at him, nose still red, “-T-That was evil Levi!” he pouted.

”Sorry! Sorry!” The paler apologised sincerely, running his fingers and wiping the tears that sprinted down Eren’s eyes. He kissed the trails and then moved to his forehead, his nose, his lips. Eren giggled when Levi even left a gathering of kisses on his left ear. 

“So...” Eren mumbled, wrapping his arms around Levi’s muscled torso, he felt like a Greek God, “What did they say then? I’m a-assuming they called.” 

Levi hummed in agreement, resting his chin over Eren’s gentle, burnt umber locks. They felt like petals under his skin, smelt like petals too.   
  
“Well...” Levi said, smirk not lost in the tone, “She’s only gone and done it.” 

“Huh?” Eren queried, turning his head to look up at Levi confusedly from where he sat in between his sand-coated legs.

”Let’s just say a particularly powerful government official in Japan ended up falling for our speckled friend, and let’s just say that she wants to marry Hange.” Eren’s eyes went huge, hope glimmering in the corners like gems, “-And maybe she has spent the last 5 months fixing and jailing the crooks of Shina. And let’s just say that we are invited to the wedding.”   
  


Eren gasped, covering his mouth with a dainty palm, letting the familiar liquid make its way down his cheeks. This time in unadulterated joy, and nothing else.   
  


When Eren let his tears spill over, Levi didn’t comment, didn’t prod, didn’t embarrass. He just ran his hands tenderly up and down Eren’s arms as they stared at the round sun sliver down into the purple and pink abyss as the day rolled kindly into the night.   
  


-

Hange was wearing a glimmering, silky black suit, tie and all, accompanied with some fancy, pointy dress shoes. Eren dared to think that she pulled it off better than most men in Shina. 

He sat across from Levi, table draped in a familiar frilly white and they both gazed, hypnotised, at Hange and their wife who were snorting while waltzing traditionally to Chopin in the middle of the room. The lights were at an orange dim and the setting quiet. 

“Wow...this i-is nice.” Eren thought out loud, in a dazed trance. Levi snickered from across and Eren’s cheeks went red. Why he was still endeared by the older, he didn’t know.

It was strange to Eren how they’d explored each other’s body, each other’s touch, said things that would be better left unuttered. Been through things that no person should have and yet it was moments like this with Levi that would be tucked away safely into his memories, moments like this that charmed him into a halt. Telling him _just look, appreciate this._

”H-How did we even get here...?” Eren wondered, once again not realising the words had practically jumped right out his mouth before he could catch. 

“This is going to sound so damn cheesy, but may I give my input, Sir Eren?” Levi mocked, grinning genuinely. 

“W-why go ahead Lord Ackerman.” He mocked and distantly he felt that Hange could sense them mocking their Political wife. He hoped they hadn’t though, otherwise Levi and Eren’s head would be on a sharpened spike by the end of the week.

”I think love is the answer to everything.” Levi provided, 

Eren sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, “Oh, h-here we go.” 

“No, no I’m serious!” Levi chuckled from the heart, “When people cling onto hate for so long, they don’t realise that it’s eating them up, and not the person or thing they actually hate. Now, if love is the polar opposite of hate, then it is all-creating. It creates, doesn’t consume. And then we get all this.” He gestured around with a flick of the wrist, “Lights and happiness and giggling.” 

“You m-make it sound easy.” Eren deadpanned, looking Levi straight in the eye with a look that said _we know it’s not that simple._  
  
Levi leaned closer, looking very devilish. “But it is.” He released a toothy grin, winking at the younger, “All you have to do is stop caring about that person, stop thinking about that situation. You let go of your ego, your embarrassment, your selfish desire and it all stops.” He breathed in,

“, Us humans like to hold onto things like that because we think it betters us. Truth is it just fucks us in the ass, no lube, nothing.” Eren snickered at the crude language coming from Levi.

“, We might feel good on succeeding, but how long does that feeling last? If you ask me, hate pales in the company of love. Wishing to be love, cursing love, but it doesn’t realise that if it just simply let go of the envy, the pride, the lust, the greed, it would become love.”   
  


“, People think they find happiness in riches, sex, drugs. Truth is the joy they get from looking at a gold coin is about as long lasting as the high they get from an opioid, or an orgasm. If they just stopped desire, their happiness would visit them, at least, I think so.”

Everything was playing out in measured motion, all there was in front of him was a soul, in a body that glittered angelically from fairy lights. And in that second, Eren knew that this once freezingly frigid town had transitioned into the moving, warm life that he’d dreamed about in his books. 


End file.
